Frequently Asked Questions
Q: What does Exodus 21:10 mean in simple terms?
A: Exodus 21:10 teaches that if a man marries a second wife, he must continue to provide his first wife with three essential things: food ('she’erah'), clothing ('kesutah'), and marital intimacy ('onatah'). The Torah emphasizes that he cannot reduce these obligations, ensuring the first wife's basic rights are protected.
Q: Why is Exodus 21:10 important in Jewish law?
A: This verse is foundational in Jewish marital law (Halacha) as it establishes a husband's basic obligations to his wife. The Talmud (Ketubot 47b) expands on these rights, and later codifiers like Rambam (Hilchot Ishut 12:2) derive from this verse that a husband must provide for his wife's physical and emotional needs, even if his circumstances change (e.g., taking another wife).
Q: What are the 'three obligations' mentioned in Exodus 21:10?
A: The three obligations are: 1) She’erah (food/sustenance), 2) Kesutah (clothing), and 3) Onatah (marital intimacy). Rashi explains that 'onatah' refers to conjugal rights based on the husband's availability (e.g., if he travels frequently) and the wife's needs. These form the basis of the ketubah (marriage contract) in Jewish law.
Q: Does Exodus 21:10 allow polygamy in Judaism?
A: While this verse discusses a scenario with multiple wives, the Talmud (Yevamot 65a) notes that polygamy was historically permitted but regulated. However, Rabbeinu Gershom (11th century) enacted a ban on polygamy for Ashkenazi Jews, which became widely accepted. Today, Orthodox Judaism generally prohibits taking multiple wives.
Q: How does Exodus 21:10 apply to marriage today?
A: Though polygamy is no longer practiced, this verse's principles remain relevant: A husband must prioritize his wife's physical and emotional needs. The Shulchan Aruch (Even HaEzer 69) rules that these obligations apply even during financial hardship. Modern halachic authorities emphasize that mutual respect and care—derived from these Torah mandates—are essential for a healthy Jewish marriage.
Context in Torah
The verse (Shemot 21:10) appears in the context of the laws regarding a Hebrew maidservant (אמה עבריה) who is betrothed to her master or his son. The Torah outlines the obligations a husband has toward his wife, even if he takes another wife. This verse emphasizes that the first wife's basic rights—sustenance (שארה), clothing (כסותה), and marital intimacy (עונתה)—must not be diminished.
Rashi's Explanation
Rashi explains the three obligations as follows:
Rashi emphasizes that these rights are absolute and cannot be reduced, even if the husband marries another woman.
Rambam's Halachic Perspective
In Hilchot Ishut (12:1-2), Rambam codifies this verse as a fundamental marital obligation. He states that a husband must provide for his wife’s basic needs, and failure to do so constitutes a violation of Torah law. Even if he marries additional wives, the first wife’s entitlements remain unchanged.
Talmudic Discussion (Ketubot 47b, 61b)
The Talmud elaborates on these obligations:
The Gemara stresses that these are mitzvot aseh (positive commandments) and are non-negotiable.
Midrashic Insight (Mechilta)
The Mechilta connects this verse to the broader principle of marital fairness. Even in polygamous marriages (permitted under Torah law but later restricted by Rabbinic decree), a husband must treat each wife equitably in terms of basic rights. The Midrash warns that neglecting these duties leads to discord and is morally reprehensible.
Later Commentators (Ibn Ezra, Chizkuni)
Ibn Ezra notes that the term יגרע ("diminish") implies an active prohibition against reducing her rights, whether financially or emotionally. Chizkuni adds that this law serves as a safeguard against neglect, ensuring that a first wife’s dignity is preserved even in complex family structures.