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Genesis 21:11 - Avraham's painful paternal dilemma

Genesis 21:11 - בראשית 21:11

Hebrew Text

וַיֵּרַע הַדָּבָר מְאֹד בְּעֵינֵי אַבְרָהָם עַל אוֹדֹת בְּנוֹ׃

English Translation

And the thing was very grievous in Avraham’s eyes because of his son.

Transliteration

Va'yera ha'davar me'od b'einei Avraham al odot b'no.

Hebrew Leining Text

וַיֵּ֧רַע הַדָּבָ֛ר מְאֹ֖ד בְּעֵינֵ֣י אַבְרָהָ֑ם עַ֖ל אוֹדֹ֥ת בְּנֽוֹ׃
וַיֵּ֧רַע הַדָּבָ֛ר מְאֹ֖ד בְּעֵינֵ֣י אַבְרָהָ֑ם עַ֖ל אוֹדֹ֥ת בְּנֽוֹ׃

🎵 Listen to leining

Parasha Commentary

Context of the Verse

The verse (Bereshit 21:11) describes Avraham Avinu's distress upon hearing Sarah's demand to send away Hagar and Yishmael. This follows the celebration of Yitzchak's weaning, where Sarah observed Yishmael's behavior and insisted that he not inherit alongside Yitzchak.

Rashi's Explanation

Rashi (Bereshit 21:11) explains that Avraham's distress stemmed from his deep love for Yishmael as his son. Despite Yishmael's problematic actions (as noted in Bereshit 21:9), Avraham still felt anguish at the thought of sending him away. Rashi emphasizes that Avraham's compassion reflects the natural love of a father for his child, even when discipline is necessary.

Rambam's Perspective

Rambam (Hilchot De'ot 2:3) discusses the balance between compassion and justice in parenting. Avraham's distress illustrates the tension between these values—while Sarah's concern for Yitzchak's spiritual future was justified (as later affirmed by Hashem in Bereshit 21:12), Avraham's grief highlights the difficulty of making such a painful decision.

Midrashic Insights

  • Midrash Rabbah (Bereshit 53:11): The phrase "וַיֵּרַע הַדָּבָר מְאֹד" ("the thing was very grievous") underscores the intensity of Avraham's emotional struggle. The Midrash compares this to later biblical figures who faced profound moral dilemmas, teaching that even righteous leaders experience anguish when making difficult choices.
  • Tanchuma (Vayera 1): Notes that Avraham's distress was compounded by his earlier prayer for Yishmael (Bereshit 17:18). Sending him away seemed to contradict his hopes for Yishmael's future, demonstrating how divine plans sometimes unfold in unexpected ways.

Halachic Implications

The Gemara (Rosh Hashanah 16b) cites this episode as a basis for the concept of zechut avot (merit of the forefathers). Yishmael's eventual repentance (as hinted in Bereshit 25:9) is attributed to Avraham's initial distress and prayers, showing how a parent's sincere concern can influence a child's ultimate return to righteousness.

📚 Talmud Citations

This verse is not quoted in the Talmud.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: Why was Avraham upset in Genesis 21:11?
A: Avraham was deeply distressed because Sarah asked him to send away Hagar and Yishmael (his son). Though it was difficult, Hashem told Avraham to listen to Sarah (Rashi on Genesis 21:12).
Q: What does Genesis 21:11 teach us about parenting?
A: It shows that even great leaders like Avraham experience pain when making tough decisions about their children. The Torah emphasizes Avraham’s love for Yishmael by calling him 'his son' (בְּנוֹ), teaching that parental love persists even in difficult situations (Midrash Bereishit Rabbah 53:11).
Q: How did Avraham handle this difficult situation in Genesis 21:11?
A: Despite his grief, Avraham sought Divine guidance. Hashem reassured him that Yishmael would also become a great nation (Genesis 21:13). This teaches that we should turn to Hashem when facing painful family decisions (Rambam, Hilchot De’ot 2:3).
Q: Why does the Torah emphasize Avraham’s emotions in this verse?
A: The Torah highlights that even righteous people experience deep emotions. The phrase 'very grievous in Avraham’s eyes' (וַיֵּרַע הַדָּבָר מְאֹד) teaches that moral dilemmas can be painful, but we must still follow Hashem’s will (Talmud, Berachot 7a).