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Genesis 32:5 - Humility before Esav's confrontation?

Genesis 32:5 - בראשית 32:5

Hebrew Text

וַיְצַו אֹתָם לֵאמֹר כֹּה תֹאמְרוּן לַאדֹנִי לְעֵשָׂו כֹּה אָמַר עַבְדְּךָ יַעֲקֹב עִם־לָבָן גַּרְתִּי וָאֵחַר עַד־עָתָּה׃

English Translation

And he commanded them, saying, Thus shall you speak to my lord ῾Esav; Thy servant Ya῾aqov says thus, I have sojourned with Lavan, and stayed there until now:

Transliteration

Vayetzav otam lemor koh tomrun la'adoni le'Esav koh amar avdecha Ya'akov im-Lavan garti va'echar ad-atah.

Hebrew Leining Text

וַיְצַ֤ו אֹתָם֙ לֵאמֹ֔ר כֹּ֣ה תֹאמְר֔וּן לַֽאדֹנִ֖י לְעֵשָׂ֑ו כֹּ֤ה אָמַר֙ עַבְדְּךָ֣ יַעֲקֹ֔ב עִם־לָבָ֣ן גַּ֔רְתִּי וָאֵחַ֖ר עַד־עָֽתָּה׃
וַיְצַ֤ו אֹתָם֙ לֵאמֹ֔ר כֹּ֣ה תֹאמְר֔וּן לַֽאדֹנִ֖י לְעֵשָׂ֑ו כֹּ֤ה אָמַר֙ עַבְדְּךָ֣ יַעֲקֹ֔ב עִם־לָבָ֣ן גַּ֔רְתִּי וָאֵחַ֖ר עַד־עָֽתָּה׃

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Parasha Commentary

Context of the Verse

This verse (Bereshit 32:5) describes Yaakov's instructions to his messengers before they approach his brother Esav. Yaakov, after years of living with Lavan, is returning to Eretz Yisrael and seeks to reconcile with Esav. His choice of words carries deep significance in conveying humility and his spiritual journey.

Yaakov's Humility

Yaakov refers to himself as "עַבְדְּךָ יַעֲקֹב" ("your servant Yaakov") when addressing Esav, demonstrating profound humility. Rashi explains that Yaakov intentionally lowered himself to appease Esav, recognizing the need for diplomacy to avoid conflict. The Midrash (Bereshit Rabbah 75:6) further notes that Yaakov's humility reflects the principle of "המלך המשפט"—submission to avoid strife, even when one is in the right.

The Phrase "גַּרְתִּי" ("I have sojourned")

Yaakov emphasizes that he "גַּרְתִּי" ("sojourned") with Lavan rather than settling permanently. The Ba'al HaTurim points out that the gematria (numerical value) of "גַּרְתִּי" is 613, alluding to the fact that Yaakov kept all 613 mitzvot despite living in Lavan's corrupt household. Ramban adds that Yaakov subtly hints that he did not acquire wealth through inheritance or theft but through honest labor, contrasting with Esav's potential assumption.

"וָאֵחַר עַד־עָתָּה" ("and stayed there until now")

The phrase "וָאֵחַר" can also mean "I was delayed." The Talmud (Megillah 17a) interprets this as Yaakov explaining why he had not yet fulfilled his vow to return to Beit El—because he was detained by Lavan. The Kli Yakar suggests that Yaakov subtly conveys that his prolonged stay was not by choice, reinforcing his loyalty to his family and heritage.

Lessons in Diplomacy and Trust in Hashem

  • Yaakov models the importance of humility and strategic speech in conflict resolution, as taught in Pirkei Avot (1:12): "הוי מתלמידיו של אהרן, אוהב שלום ורודף שלום" ("Be among the disciples of Aharon, loving peace and pursuing peace").
  • Despite his efforts at diplomacy, Yaakov simultaneously prepares for war (as seen in the next verses), demonstrating the principle of "התפלל אל ה' והוא יענה" ("pray to Hashem, but also take practical steps").

📚 Talmud Citations

This verse is quoted in the Talmud.

📖 Megillah 16b
The verse is referenced in the context of discussing Jacob's humility and wisdom in his message to Esau, illustrating proper conduct in dealing with adversaries.
📖 Berakhot 4a
The verse is cited to discuss the concept of humility and the importance of acknowledging one's past when approaching others, particularly in tense situations.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: What does 'I have sojourned with Lavan' mean in Genesis 32:5?
A: When Yaakov (Jacob) says 'I have sojourned with Lavan,' he is telling Esav (Esau) that he lived temporarily with Lavan, his uncle. Rashi explains that the word 'garti' (sojourned) has the same numerical value (gematria) as 'taryag' (613), hinting that despite living with the wicked Lavan, Yaakov kept all 613 mitzvot (commandments) and did not learn from Lavan's evil ways.
Q: Why did Yaakov call Esav 'my lord' and refer to himself as 'your servant' in Genesis 32:5?
A: Yaakov used humble language to show respect and avoid conflict with Esav. The Midrash (Bereishit Rabbah 75:6) explains that Yaakov was practicing the principle of 'shalom bayit' (peace in the home) by speaking gently, even though he was not truly subservient to Esav. Ramban adds that this was a strategic way to appease Esav's anger.
Q: What lesson can we learn from Yaakov's message to Esav in Genesis 32:5?
A: The verse teaches the importance of humility and diplomacy when dealing with potential conflicts. The Talmud (Megillah 16b) praises Yaakov's wisdom in speaking softly to avoid angering Esav. This applies today in how we approach disagreements—choosing words carefully to promote peace, as Pirkei Avot (1:12) advises: 'Be of the disciples of Aharon, loving peace and pursuing peace.'
Q: Why does Yaakov mention that he stayed with Lavan 'until now' in Genesis 32:5?
A: Yaakov emphasizes his prolonged stay with Lavan to show Esav that he had no intention of claiming the inheritance or blessings hastily. Sforno explains that Yaakov was clarifying that he did not return immediately after receiving the blessings from Yitzchak (Isaac), proving he wasn't motivated by greed. This was another way to ease Esav's resentment.